The art of engaging with life

A framework for high-frequency living

Well-being is fundamentally about our relationship with ourselves and with life.

This is the premise of my coming book, a work of non-fiction that’s been five years in the making. It’s a project that has not left me, no matter how many times I’ve left it.

This book has prompted an exploration of many concepts that I’ve woven into my life in ways that have become so natural that I forget they are uncommon. Luckily my clients help me realize just how powerful they can be.

One of those concepts is something I’m sharing here today. It’s about how we relate to life and its tasks. “Awakened doing,” as Eckhart Tolle calls it.

This one has hit home with many clients of mine. In fact, one of my current clients, a leader in a Fortune 500 company, found this concept so impactful that he shared it with his entire team after our coaching session.

This is about living harmoniously through relating to life in three ways: Acceptance, Enjoyment, and Enthusiasm. Each one represents a certain vibrational frequency of consciousness that we can bring to life’s activities, no matter how simple or complex they appear to be.

Let’s start from the bottom. The baseline of a blissful life.

Acceptance: The Foundation of Peace

Whenever something happens, as soon as it happens, the only logical choice is to accept it.

Seriously. It’s the only fair choice to ourselves. It’s also the only choice that makes sense.

A client of mine recently didn’t want to do something, a professional responsibility.

“Are you going to do it anyway?” I asked.

“Yes.”

“Then why resist it?”

The shoulders relaxed. An exhale. Resistance is a choice, an effortful one. We just sometimes forget we’re making it.

Sometimes the ego takes issue with acceptance, thinking that it means we don’t initiate any sort of change in our lives, such as taking action to shift an undesirable situation.

Acceptance is, in no way, an impediment to action. It actually facilitates it.

Acceptance does not mean to perpetuate a situation or to passively endure it without action. Instead, acceptance means allowing life to be as it is (because it is) and surrendering our mental resistance to reality, for it is mental resistance that perpetuates suffering and dis-ease.

When we bring acceptance to our life’s tasks, happenings, and responsibilities, we eliminate the cause of inner suffering. In doing so, we free up mental and emotional energy to more effectively navigate whatever situation we were previously resisting (see: take action).

Regardless of whether you take action or not, you’ll be at peace. That’s pretty cool.

Acceptance is the baseline for a harmonious and peaceful existence and is a prerequisite for taking effective action—action that’s not riddled with resistance, turmoil, and reactivity.

We start with acceptance as it lays the foundation for ascending to the next levels of relating to life.

Enjoyment: Finding Joy in the Present

Once you can accept a situation, the next level is to see if you can find enjoyment in it.

Acceptance leads to peace. Enjoyment leads to, well, joy.

“Great. So you’re going to go anyway. You’ve accepted that. I can see your shoulders have dropped. Now, are there any ways to find joy in this obligation?”

If you can accept it, ask yourself, “Can I actually find joy in what’s happening?”

Questions are like programming the mind. It organizes itself to find an answer.

Sometimes this requires a shift in perspective, seeing how a situation might be working in your favor.

Sometimes it’s simply a little fun.

You can make a task into a game, challenge yourself in a new way, or look for opportunities to learn, grow, or play with whatever is unfolding.

How could it be enjoyable?

Enjoyment is about harnessing the energy of play. So, how do you want to play?

Add some music. Dance. Set a timer. Experiment with a new way of doing an old thing. Make the familiar unfamiliar. Pepper in some presence. Soak in the wonder of life.

Take in the miracle of this existence. Enjoy the miracle of your existence.

A life full of acceptance and enjoyment is a beautiful life, although, for some, it may lack a greater sense of purpose, which brings us to the next modality we can experiment with.

Enthusiasm: Aligning with Purpose and Passion

The highest frequency way of relating to life (at least in this model) is enthusiasm, a word derived from the Greek "en theos," meaning "in God."

Enthusiasm is one of my favorite words because, as its root implies, its about embodying a state of being filled with divine energy.

“Now that you’ve not only accepted the fact of this professional responsibility, but are actually looking forward to it, how can you connect it to your purpose? How does it align with what’s most important to you?”

I love connecting with people who are enthusiastic about, well, anything really—anyone who is deeply connected to a craft, hobby, activity, topic, project, or whatever… It doesn’t matter if they’re talking about the great pyramids or fishing for trout.

When someone is enthusiastic, they become electric. Vibrant. They light up.

There’s an undeniable quality to enthusiasm, and I perceive it to be one of the highest frequency ways of relating to life. And it’s a frequency I enjoy helping my clients tap into.

Enthusiasm is more than enjoyment. There’s something deeper than joy. Certainly deeper than pleasure. There’s meaning. There’s passion. There’s purpose. There’s a profound spiritual connection involved. There’s an energizing element. A renewing feeling.

You can ascend from enjoyment to enthusiasm when you find purpose and passion in what you are doing.

Align your daily activities with your life’s mission and values. Find a larger meaning in your actions, and see them as part of a universal intelligence, and the part you play in the orchestration of that intelligence.

Explore how you can connect tasks, activities, and responsibilities to a greater sense of purpose. Perhaps that purpose involves values such as kindness, for which there are an abundance of opportunities to practice each day with yourself and others. Perhaps that purpose involves qualities such as equanimity or resilience, which all of life’s ups and downs give you a chance to embody. Maybe it’s some great humanitarian effort or your profession and the contribution it provides or maybe it’s a hobby you bring into your days. Maybe it’s gratitude for the blessings in your life or maybe it’s a a moment of mindfulness in the morning with a slow cup of coffee.

What are you enthusiastic about? What do you care about? Why?

How can you bring that enthusiasm into other areas of your life?

To do so is to expand your sphere of enthusiasm and bring an elevated frequency to more and more of your existence.

What happens from there is yours to find out.

Practical Application

You can play with these levels in your own life to see how you can bring acceptance, enjoyment, and enthusiasm into your daily experiences. Here’s a quick rundown of how you can start:

1. Acceptance: Begin by acknowledging and accepting your current reality without resistance. Allow life to be as it is, for any other choice puts you in a state of resistance (see: self-generated suffering).

2. Enjoyment: Look for ways to find joy in your daily tasks. Change your perspective, make the mundane fun, and lean into life, engaging more fully in whatever it brings you.

3. Enthusiasm: Identify what you care about most and align your life’s activities with your purpose, values, interests, and passions. Bring meaning and intention to even the smallest tasks and see how they fit into the bigger picture of your mission, vision, and beliefs.

Acceptance lays the groundwork for peace, enjoyment brings positivity and engagement, and enthusiasm ignites passion and purpose.

By relating to life on these levels, you can create more harmony, well-being, and fulfillment in life, if you’re into that sort of thing.